As I lay in bed tonight knowing that I a completely and totally 39 weeks pregnant I will say I am more than a little nervous about this new adventure we are nearing. I am so totally excited to meet this little one but nervous all at the same time.
One I never dreamed I would have a child some day and I am so thankful that the good Lord decided that was in my plan because the past 5 years with Charlot have been amazing. So as a person who didn't think she could have kiddos one kid is hard enough to fathom let alone two. I mean I see the crib all set up, the clothes are folded, the car seat is ready to go in, it's all there I am the one who is struggling I guess.
Two we waited quite a long time before we decided to start this adventure again then it took a while to get here. So I think I just can't seem to believe that God sees me as good enough to do this over again. I know it sounds crazy but I'm sure every mom out there has thought am I really qualified to be raising this little person and preparing it for the big world ahead? Please tell me others have wondered about this!
Third and probably the thing I am most nervous about is...is my heart really big enough for another one? I can't imagine loving someone else like I love Charlot. How in the world will my heart let more in? How will I still love Charlot just as much? Will I love this baby and raise it the way I am with her? Oh it is so hard I never want either of my children to doubt that they were wanted, prayed for, welcomed and loved.
Why yes this is a little deeper than my typical blogs I just needed off my heart and head tonight. I haven't yet decided if I will actually post this or not...so if you see it I thought others could be helped. Or maybe I was hoping other momma's out there would reassure me.
Finally this is my 39 week (Charlot) verses 39 week (Baby T #2) wowszer!!! I am not a fan of belly pics for me frankly but I am very glad that I have these to remember.
Baby T #2 you are soon to meet us! Trust me you sister and momma are slightly crazy but daddy helps keep things grounded. See ya soon!
